Today's A Betta Day!

Don't have bunches of time but I wanted to note that I am feeling much better and I have stayed below 25 carbs (mostly below 20) the past week and have stayed in Ketosis the entire time. Official Weigh in is tomorrow but I couldn't wait, got on the scale only to find I have not lost any more YET. No worries!

A friend sent me this.. it made me smile:



Will catch up later!

Still Rollin' Right Along and ARGGGG!!!!

Well it's been a while since I have posted.

Things are good. I am doing better now that Ketosis has finally kicked in. I LOVE Ketosis. I think it is amazing the way it helps my hunger. It's nice to have what I think must be "normal" hunger, you know the type of hunger you feel when your blood sugar is not blasting you with cravings.

I think this is what healthy hunger must feel like. I can look at the clock and see that it's been 3-5 hours and I didn't realize I worked right thru lunch.

I have been crazy busy this past week. I have a home based business. Well 3 actually!

My Gallery Website:
www.CaryMartinDesigns.com

My Etsy Lovely LUXE store:
www.LovelyLuxeJewels.etsy.com

My Etsy CaryMartinDesigns store:
www.CaryMartinDesigns.etsy.com

My Etsy gemstone store:
www.GemGourmet.etsy.com

I stay pretty busy and especially since I just got back from my HUGE Gemshow and plunged us into debt again! I have pressure (well it's pressure I put on myself of course) to make this back as soon as possible so I am crazy busy. It is cool to not be constantly thinking about food. Low Fat diets suck. Period.

I am feeling PRETTY freaking bad right now because I am major hormonal. Serioulsy don't look at me like that I might have to bitch slap you

and then feel really bad about it and start crying. and then 5 minutes later tell you how much I love you ... I am totally freaky like that right now...

Did you know that we hold estrogen in our fat cells (excess estrogen). I learned this years ago when I was Dx with PCOS (Poly Cyctic Ovarian Symdrome) - and when we lose fat the excess estrogen is released into our bloodstream. so THERE. I am really NOT feeling all sweet and fluffy right now.

So far so good...

Working on a post...
can't get my pix to load correctly right now.. WTF Blogger?

Wow, What's this? IT'S ENERGY!!!!

ENERGY!

I just had to write about how WELL, hell AMAZING I am feeling.. I am a bundle of energy. It's crazy. I realized I have been feeling like a slug so much in the past. I am getting LOTS done around the house and managing to get some more gemstone listings (one of my businesses!) up at the same time.

I used to bitch about not being able to handle the house and my business at the same time but if my energy stays this grand I will for sure be caught up fairly soon.

I feel very good. I also am very clear headed only my mind won't stop running thru all the things I NEED to do. I started a list. (soon I imagine I will have lists for my lists!).

I am also seeming to be coming out of what was apparently a depression. It's sad because I didn't know I was feeling down. It's sort of like you didn't know your eyesight was that bad until you put on glasses.

I have been taking 5HTP which helps control cravings and also helps depression... It seems to be working, I just ordered another bottle.

I am going to be weighing Friday just because I am curious how I have done this week so far. Of course Monday will still be official weigh in day.

I am on day 10 of being back on LC.

Last night I made Italian spiced meatballs (an even mixture of ground beef and sage breakfast sausage and LOTS of Penzey's Pizza spice.

I mixed it all together with an egg and rolled them up and cooked them in a pan with a little peanut oil - just about a quarter inch in the pan.

We then dipped them in the Waldon's Spicy BBQ sauce (0 Carbs for 2T) and had Italian green beans on the side.

Meal was maybe a total of 5 carbs and REALLY good. But how can you beat Italian meatballs!

Good Morning Sunshine!

Official weigh in is on Mondays..so I got on the scale.

I have lost 4# my first week back on induction which is RIGHT ON SCHEDULE!!! I am re-reading the Atkins book and it’s a good thing. It says that normally women can expect around 8 pounds for induction and men 10. That is the two weeks of induction. I am one week in.

I did realize I am not to be having nuts and also eating too much cheese so I had Patrick hide the nuts - that way he can have them when he wants and I'm not tempted. I will add them later on.

I want to do induction for a long time, at least until I really stop losing for 3 weeks in a row. I admit that I wanted to see like 8 pounds, like I used to when starting Induction but I know I won't see those numbers again. Well also before I was really carbed up… Since I was just coming off WeightWatchers when I started LC again I am sure I was not that full of excess glycogen thus not that much water weight which is what the 4 pounds truly was, but NOW I am in ketosis so I am burning fat.

What many Atkins followers don't understand is that you burn a combo of dietary fat and actual body fat. IF you over eat too much fat you won't lose body fat so you really STILL have to watch that you don't go overboard.

*´¨)
¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ * ♥ ♥ ♥
♥ ♥ ♥ ATKINS!!!♥


I am reading around on line for inspiration this chilly morning and ran across this success story I like:
http://www.lowcarb.ca/stories/story014.html

I truly LOVE this from his Top 10 advice :

5. Do nothing half-assed. If you are dieting, be strict. If you are exercising, push yourself . Don’t do anything halfway or you will develop the habit of doing things halfway. The number one enemy of the dieter is the attitude of “I’ll go a little at a time.” It rarely works.

6. Do not weight daily. Weigh once a week at first, then once a month later. Constant weigh ins are either really really good, or really really bad. And while really really good doesn’t do a whole lot besides make you smile, really, really bad can get you to quit.

I especially need to stop weighing so often. I really do.

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Last night I made a great meal.

I pounded chicken breast flat and laid slices of cream cheese and ham on one side… then added lots of pepper and garlic powder and a little salt and folded the other half over. I had microwaved a few pieces of bacon until almost done and then laid them over the chicken in an 8 x8 pan. Roasted in the oven for about 35 min. (I like my chicken pretty well done)..

Had to broil it a bit so the bacon was good and crisp. I had earlier in the day sliced a cucumber and a half (just for the two of us) and marinated it in a LC Italian dressing with chopped green onion.. it was simple and surprisingly good.

I Want to Go SHOPPING! already...

Thursday, January 14, 2010

So.. I ate too much PB and nuts yesterday but still down a pound since yesterday. I don’t think I was as carbed up as I have been before when re-starting induction because I am not losing as much as fast. I am not going to really count calories or watch what I eat (except carbs) until my weight loss stops for 10 days in a row or such. Sooner or later I will have to AGAIN.

I had 24 carbs yesterday.
about 30 the day before.. (on Southbeach I have not been doing as low carbs as I was on Induction Atkins).

No worries though.
Doing good. Looking at clothes today! I want to buy some new stuff but not sure if I really can yet (cash). I found this outfit I want at NewPort-news.com:



I want it in the blue.. it’s a long tunic cami and long dolman sleeve sweater jacket. I want these pants too:



They are boot cut, control top “leggings’.. (I can't stand normal leggings on heavy women, I am sorry you need to be a waif to pull these things off!)

But these are bootcut and have a control top! How cool is that?

I could wear them with the above outfit because the jacket will cover my arse and hips. God help my arse and hips~

Looking at clothes keeps me motivated.

I Heart Shirataki Noodles...

It's true love...



Today has been a good day.

I am feeling pretty tired and I know it's just carb withdrawal. I am taking LOTS of minerals (always helps) and tonight I am making a great dinner.

I had some shirataki noodles in the bottom of my fridge and decided to play around with them for lunch.

I thought about what was all in "fried rice" and came up with a sort of "recipe" for the noodles that turned out so good!

I rinsed them really well in hot water and then "dried" them in a skillet until the water had evaporated. I threw in a little garlic and green onion and grated ginger and a T of peanut oil and sautéed them.

Then I added chicken (pulled off our chicken leftover from last night) and an egg and cooked it and at the very end added a little chili paste, soy sauce and toasted sesame oil.

It was so good I am making more tonight for dinner when Patrick gets home.

I LOVE how versatile Shirataki is.

Now if I could find a way to do the peanut noodles that would be the bomb.

Officially Back On Low Carb

Nice Sunrise - Where does the road lead?


Well I thought that was a cool photo to represent a new beginning. The sun just dawning on a new day and a highway that leads on down the road.

Starting back on Low Carb today.
Not much fanfare, just going to do it.

Went to the store, stocked up. I've done this before. I know it's the best thing for not only my weight but my health (blood pressure, blood sugar.. etc).

Didn't feel like doing much of a menu. Not really wanting to get too difficult with cooking and such right now. Have a desire to keep it simple for a while.

I will have to shake things up soon enough, but for now I want it easy.

Hard Night Last Night...

Well last night was hard. I am such an emotional eater, I got upset about something and just started pigging on almonds, cheese and crackers. I truly was very hungry when it started but then I just kept on eating WAY too much. I just ate on auto pilot.

I know the fact that I let myself get too hungry was part of the cause I am also so damn spastic about dieting right now, reading constantly, reviewing stuff on line, watching diet programs I have recorded on the TV. My mind is saturated and over whelmed. It's too much.

I also decided I am too hard on myself.

I woke up this morning with a thought in my mind that I need to take better emotional care of myself. Let my mind free a bit and allow myself to FEEL.

I really need to nurture myself more. This was the first thought that popped in my head as I was waking this morning and I have learned to honor those thoughts.

Anyhoo. I looked at the fact that I had three out of four good days and decided that I would be happy with that (it’s 75%~!!) and not beat myself up and get right back on.

I AM going to lose allot of weight in 2010 and I know I will get in my zone soon enough.

In the mean time I need to enjoy my life! I don’t have to have the “wrong” foods to do that. Whatever those foods are.. I know they are white stuff and SUGAR (I started reading my "Good Calories - Bad Calories again).. I am going to incorporate more protein in an effort to not be so hungry all day long!

So basically I need to stop with the diet over-saturation -constantly bombarding my mind and vision with everything diet, in such a spastic way and learn to enjoy my life and relax a bit more! Of course that does not mean I have to eat crap, I just need to STOP BEING SO UPTIGHT and obsessing!





Become a bit more ZEN. Learn to notice and embrace all the goodness around me and let it flow a little more.

In a Word, Inspired...

Part of a collage I did a couple of years ago...

Well doing pretty good today.
Lost 3.5 pounds since yesterday. Love the beginning of a new diet for a quick few pounds freaking GONE!

Dealing with a little hunger tonight, I know I am not TRULY hungry though.

It's just almost 7pm and it's time for dinner only Patrick's not home yet and I like to wait until he's here. Had my afternoon popcorn snack. I LOVE the SmartPop. I can eat the entire bag (not the sad little 100 cal. one either) on my program.

Today's been good.
I am feeling inspired and motivated. I love the fact that I live in FL. I can't wait until I am more comfortable in my skin at the beach.

Well until later... NightyNite.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
I love this art. This represents metamorphosis or the phoenix rising out of the ashes of an old life that's left behind. This represents change to me and it's very inspirational in my mind. I love to look at it. It makes me feel joy inside.

2010 is going to be an epic year.

I had my Black Eyed Pea Salad on New Years Day and also some yesterday. Today I am back on my diet.

Today I am actually going to fast (well I always have broth). I have some Pho paste for a nice broth I will have at dinner time.

I am only fasting one day. I am considering one day a week.

I quit smoking (for good a couple of months ago - I had smoked on and off in an attempt to quit for about an year) and it's times like these I would LOVE to have a cig!

I always associated fasting with cig days. So I will be fighting off any desire I have for one today.. No worries!

Monday's will be official weigh in day. I went ahead and weighed today just to see where I was at before my Fast day.. 232.5. (ate LOTS of black eye peas and corn bread over the last two days!). I am expecting to lose 3# in my fast today. We will see.

Sweet Sunday to everyone!

A New Start, Even Before The New Year...

Getting a jump start on 2010. It’s going to be an EPIC year!

I wanted to comment that I almost deleted my past blog posts, I want this to be a fresh new start but then I thought about it and decided to keep all of them. I am myself a compilation of my past experiences and my diet is also.

So although this is a brand new start, I am keeping all my old entries.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I weighed 234 yesterday morning.
I just checked my journal from Jan. last year and I weighed 241. So I at least didn’t have my normal 10 pound a year gain. I was actually glad to see that.

I have not posted my weight much in the past on my blog. I am going to do it this year. I am also joining Weight Watchers some time in Jan. or Feb., not sure I will do the diet to a "T" but it will be good to have the social aspect of the meetings.

I have learned that Low Carb is good for getting me motivated again. It cuts my cravings and makes it easier to diet (Ketosis side effect is a much lower appetite). I am not sure how long I will stay on Low Carb but I will be starting it pretty soon. Maybe I will plan on staying on it until I am 15 or so pounds down.

My immediate plan is to finish off any foods in the house that are “normal” foods.. (not eating any crap.. no more Rum Balls or Christmas Cookies.. no Egg Nog or such). I am using up the foods we have left in the house, eating small amounts (low portions) and just counting calories until foods are gone and I have to go shopping, then we are starting Low Carb for a while.

Low Carb is pretty hard on my electrolytes. I lose minerals allot so I have to take a massive amt. of supplements while I am doing the diet. (Atkins) so I won’t stay on it for months at a time, (at least I have not been able to in the past).

I am also going to get back into Raw this summer.


If I could wave a magic wand...


and have any weight loss I would dream of it would be to lose 90#. I want to weigh 144 – (I am 5’- 4”).

Using different plans thru this transition will also definitely be in my future. I get bored and like to read different diet books (plans) and shake up my way of eating from time to time with different plans.

I have not started back to my walking. Will start again soon.

Confusion and Uncertainty...

Hum... well I have been away for a while. I have not really been able to keep focused on anything. Not diet, not my job, not the house... nothing. I am truly not exactly sure why, just maybe being lazy?

A few things have brought be back around. I spent the day with my very gouragous cousin L. and she always gets me motivated. She is very dynamic and svelte. Always has been. We talked about life, love and being over 40.

I spent the day with her while she tried on beautiful size 8 clothes and while I helped her in and out of these beautiful things wished in the back of my mind, like I have 100 times that I could be wearing these stunning clothes. If only to be trying them on!

Then Friday I went out with my friend D. We went to a SKA club in Ybor. We were old broads for sure... but enjoyed it bunches. I wished so much I was not so overweight. I would have enjoyed myself MUCH more.

My weight has been on my mind all this time I just have not re-committed myself. It gets more difficult as the holidays come around. It's like knowing that I want to bake and enjoy the holidays just puts me in a frame of mind that I should just give in until Jan.

This happens every year. I have been fighting this fat for over 13 years.

Every year during the holidays I do the same thing. First I make a commitment to just bake a few things, on chosen days and the rest of the time diet.

Like only allow myself Thanksgiving and the day after off. Also I do the same thing around Christmas. I decide I will diet most of the month and only bake 3-4 days out of it. Knowing that I am going to have to make my Christmas Snowflakes. (It's just not Christmas if I don't. It feels just wrong). They are such a tradition and they feel important to me. I always make them for Patrick to take to the office and I think they make him feel special that day while everyone oooh's and awwww's them. They are pretty spectacular if I say so myself *smile*.. check out a pix of them:

Gooood Morning!

Just got in from my walk and took a nice cool shower.. I know I can't stop bitching about the heat but I am ready for some cooler weather! It was 90 deg already when I got in this morning (10:45am). I would sure love a little chill in the air on my walk damnit!


I would love to walk on this path! But alas I live in Orlando.

I still don't love to sweat, well I love how the walking makes me feel but I can't wait to get in the shower. I don't like to stay sweaty anyway. It's the Southern Bell in me~ *smiles*

Yesterday I was so busy that I actually missed one of my snacks and got busy and only ate half of my lunch and came in under 1000 cal for the whole day.

I have a breakfast I love now.. it's an Ezekiel wrap (sprouted grains and NO gluten!) and two egg whites with one egg added in. I saute some tomato (usually a whole small one) and a couple ounces of onion and then throw in the egg and add lots of hot sauce.. I love this and it keeps me full for quite some time. I have also been adding 50 cal. worth of cheese although I truly need to give up all dairy!

My 40's are going to be the decade of change! They already are.

Today is a good day *smile*

I love orchids.. isn't that beautiful? I just wanted to start the day off with a nice flower pix. It made me smile, hope it will you too.

Today is a better day than I have had in quite some time.

I was a bit disappointed but at least I am back where I was before our food fest this past weekend. I know I am doing it right. I started walking again last Sat. and I feel better already.

I actually tried to jog a bit on a downhill area in our neighborhood but my big toe started hurting pretty badly so I stopped. I have had issues in the past with my feet (been Dx with arthritis in my feet) and I know that hard walking like I am doing will give me almost as good results as jogging and I will try jogging again from time to time until I don’t have issues with my feet.

I have heard too many stories about people hurting their feet and knees jogging when they are still pretty overweight.

I walked 40 min. again today. It was a tiny bit easier than on Monday but still a VERY good workout and I am always extremely hot when I get back in. I can’t believe it’s Oct. and it’s still in the 90’s here. Even at 10am it’s already so steamy. I can’t wait until it cools off a bit. I truly miss the Fall.

I am keeping my commitment to myself to walk 2 miles a day, every day, until Oct. 24th when we leave for Vegas/Sedona. I want to be able to do lots of walking in Vegas and hiking on Sedona and the walking here in this heat will certainly prepare me a little for up there.

Monday thru yesterday (Wed) I kept my calories average 1350 a day. Today is going to be around 1250.

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Wow.. I had to write about something I discovered that is truly GOOD!
It's Ancient Harvest Red Quinoa. Quinoa contains more protein than any other grain and is gluten free.



Because of my previous Atkins diet I have had a fear of any grains and rarely eat them. I am changing that and adding this on a regular basis. I made it with organic veggie broth instead of water and it was divine!

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I've been reading a couple Blogs trying to get/keep motivated.

I love this one, she is doing so great! Her blog is very inspirational, she just got in the 100's! (I can't WAIT!!) check it out:

bigbottomblogger.blogspot.com

Thank you to Greta for the nice comment! I didn't think anyone at all was reading.
Your blog has helped bring me out of my funk a bit!

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Another fun site that is truly crazy (advise, don't look at it when you are hungry.. it's insane!

Well and just OMG.. this site is hilarious:
thisiswhyyourefat.com

WTF? Velveeta fudge?

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More inspirational reading:

Wow.. love this story of a woman who lost 180 pounds without bypass surgery.. one thing she says about telling God that if she got one more chance to lose weight, that she would somehow learn to love and respect her body.

I am right there right now. That is how I feel… I have abused myself for so long.. it’s time. Here is her story:

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/goal/182307-lori-bells-story-180-pounds-lost.html

Doing So So...

Well honestly I did excellent all last week and then the weekend came and Patrick and I were running around shopping for clothes for our trip to Vegas/Sedona (Oct 24-Nov 2) and I guess I was just in too much of a celebratory mood because when it came time to eat I just ate whatever I wanted and I wanted rich fatty food, booze AND dessert.

I pretty much ate whatever I wanted Sat and Sun and today (Monday) I am back on.
I have to not do this on the weekends, this tends to pretty much wipe out all the good I do during the week.

I have been thru this before. This is something I fall back into if I am not careful.

I am not weighing for a couple of days.

Today I decided since I had great walking in both Sat and Sunday (hours at the mall on Sat and at least an hour walking around shopping on Sun. too) that I would start a commitment to myself to walk EVERY DAY until we leave on the 24th for Vegas.

I want to have good stamina to walk as much as we can on our trip.

So I walked 40 min. this morning and will continue on, even on Sundays, until we leave.

Still here!

Proper Way to Weigh Ones Self



It's been too long so I need to catch up.

I have been dieting still, (well on and off.. had a few fall backs) but I am doing ok.

I am a jewelry designer so I have been very busy gearing up for the holiday season.

I have four Etsy shops:

My Etsy Lovely LUXE Jewels Store:
www.LovelyluxeJewels.etsy.com

My Etsy CaryMartinDesigns store:
www.CaryMartinDesigns.etsy.com

My Etsy gemstone store:
www.GemGourmet.etsy.com

My JoeyAndRocky store:
www.JoeyandRocky.etsy.com

With the holidays soon approaching I am crazy busy making jewelry and stocking my shops. I also sell gemstones to other designers.

I was just having such a hard time focusing and something had to give and I didn't want it to be my diet so I backed off the Raw (for a while only!) and went back to my old standby of just counting calories.

It's not the best I know but for me it's better than just falling off completely..

I have actually managed to lose two more pounds.

I am unfortunately not veggie anymore right now either.

I am eating alot of convenience foods like Amy's meals at night and also a few Lean Cuisine, etc. This diet of mine is actually very simular to what you would be doing on Jenny Craig or Nutrisystem, portion controlled pre-packaged stuff. Like I said I know it's not the best long term but right now it's the lessor of two evils. No dieting or doing this.

I'm also haveing Starkist tuna kits as a snack (210 cal and high protein) almost every day in the afternoon and making my own Egg a muffins in the AM. (English muffins, canadian bacon, low fat cheese and an egg).

Staying under 1500 calories a day.. it's easy and pretty much a no brainer for me.

Several years ago I lost 50 pounds this way (of course gained it back) but it is second nature to me so it leaves my mind free to deal with business right now. You pretty much eat almost the same thing every day.

On weekends I make us a huge batch of scrambelled egg whites and tons of veggies and we have English muffins with Raw honey. It's good and it's nice to sit down together and enjoy an actual breakfast.

I AM GOING BACK TO RAW soon.. Planning on for sure Jan. 1st.

Food today:

Egg a muffin - 335
Lean Cuisine lunch - 360

Slip Sliding Away...

The last couple of days have been a struggle... It was the Labor Day weekend and Patrick and I did allot of work on the yard.. each day I started out great and did well Raw (ended my Juice Feast at 13 days and 11 pounds lost but I have gained 3 back) until late in the evening and I ended up eating Amy's meals and such because I was so hungry.

I need to start having something on hand in the house I can eat at night that is raw and more filling (have to get a new dehydrator!). Maybe a muesli with almond milk… or make some kale, or daikon or zucchini chips or some crackers or something I can munch on.

I WILL BE HAVING A GREEN SMOOTHIE TONIGHT FOR DINNER!

Food today:

Frozen banana, frozen strawberry coconut water smoothie
Sm handful goji berries
1/3 honeydew
1 Ezekiel wrap (toasted) with 1/3 C hummus
pineapple around 4pm




I am also planning on another juice feast.. This time for 14 days. I will plan on starting toward the end of the month.

I need to order the nut milk bags.

I was thinking it would be good to do planned out menus of daily juices so I can be well prepared but ahead of time but actually it’s hard to know what organic fruits/veggies the stores will have. I guess I won’t be doing that.. I will just use what good organic fruits and veggies I can find.

REALLY Struggling...

The last two days.. my poor psyche has really been in turmoil...

Well I am laying in bed this morning (just bought an amazing bed from a Friend in Fernandina Beach and my sister Stacy and her husband JB loaded it up and hauled it to us.. thank you SO much you two! It’s the most amazing bed we have ever owned)..

Anyway I am laying there in bed thinking about my out of control eating was last night (pizza pig out) and how in the past with my attempts to lose weight and change my eating lifestyle, I just seem to give in when I get really hungry. It’s like I just throw a food temper tantrum.. like an incorrigible child. It’s really like that.

It makes since I guess since I am changing my mindset and setting limits and boundaries and changing something that has been fundamental (if also WRONG) in my life for a very long time (eating whatever I what, whenever I want in as much quantity as I want).. It’s like I am having another part of me trying to rebel against the changes I want to make. It's causing serious inner turmoil.

So this morning I was reading other's blogs to work on re-focusing my mind on my Raw food world and wow, thank you to the universe for showing me this blog entry from “The Raw Model” (link is here: http://rawmodelcom.blogspot.com/2007/05/add-in-good-stuff-now-worry-about.html )

This is the entry:


‘ADD THE GOOD STUFF IN NOW, WORRY ABOUT CUTTING THE BAD STUFF OUT LATER…’



“A big thing that I learned on my path to health with living foods was that the idea of sacrifice for health will not produce a healthy person, and certainly not a happy one.

Because I was working in New York at the time, I was really trying my best to immediately lose weight and develop more lean muscle. So I cut out everything bad. Or at least I attempted to. For a few weeks, I dropped ice cream, pizza, indian food, and falafels. I was doing two green smoothies a day, plus apples. I was losing weight fast, but in my mind I was suffering. I was still addicted to those foods, and by cutting myself off right away, the weak part of me was angry and resentful towards the disciplined part of me. I was going crazy, and I would reach an occasional breaking point.

Wandering the streets of the East Village like a drug fiend, I would walk into a pizza place and order two slices. After eating them too quickly, I would realize that I was yet to be satisfied. So next, I would get a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Soon after adding that whole pint to the pizza, I was starting to feel the food-coma setting in. I would return to my apartment and lay in bed, feeling guilty and bloated. I would swear that I would learn my lesson, but these episodes would continue off and on for months.

I wasn't in the proper mindstate yet. I was too worried about what I was cutting out, and not focusing on what I should have been adding in. This is the key. Don't focus on what you want to cut out right away. Of course cooked starches and cooked oils and refined sugar are horrible and should be completely eliminated from your body, but that will happen with time. As long as you continue to feel as if you are depriving yourself of these items, you won't be ready yet. What I am saying, is that the best path early on is to just add good things in, and the rest will work itself out with time. The body will know what is good, and the idea of canceling out your healing foods with garbage again will quickly lose its appeal.

So get your green juice in everyday. Get a green smoothie in your body everyday for breakfast. Make sure you eat a grapefruit, and one avocado a day is magic. Make a superfood smoothie with coconuts and raw chocolate and goji berries and bee pollen. Eat highly mineralized raw foods. If you still desire something else, go for it. But sooner, rather than later, you will shift towards 95-100% raw without having that feeling of regret and guilt and sacrifice.

I knew the truth...I had experienced the "raw high" after those first two weeks. Nevertheless...the old habits were ingrained in my mind, and I still desired the garbage. Now, I can honestly say that I eat everything that I want. The only difference is this: What I want now isn't what I used to want. I don't miss the pizza, the burgers, the eggs and pancakes. Thats not even food in my mind anymore. I don't want it like I used to. And this will happen to you as well. Just add in the goodies, and the rest will take care of itself.

Peace and love ALL WAYS...

Anthony”


Also this reply to his post is right on:

Bless you for sharing this! It's exactly this kind of honesty that helps people that are excited about raw truly transform into people that are freed from food addictions. Raw Dogma can be really intense and misleading to the seeker. It is entirely possible to feel nutritionally elated and at the same time experience a sort of spiritual bankruptcy 'cause your mental is just not on.

Suddenly stripping yourself of all your comfort foods leaves alot of the psyche bared and ready to rumble. I'm a recovering alcoholic and I see alot of parallels between the two. Just stopping drinking is nearly impossible w/o a spiritually based program of recovery running in tandem. And if you do succeed in staying dry you're likely miserable and angry, seeing as you've just lost the only coping mechanism you had.

I find food issues to be surprisingly similar...


I could not have said it any better.. THIS is what I am dealing with right now.. I am divided in my psyche.




I WANT and need to eat Raw but my inner child is revolting. I have to be less hard on myself and take it more slow…

This is also very enlightening.. I have to STOP kicking myself and just go with the transition as I can and as it comes. I can continually re-focus back on Raw as often as I need to but most important is that I just ease up on myself.

Wednesday~ Day 10 of my Juice Feast!

I hope to lose an additional 2 pounds before coming off of juice feast on Sunday.

I REALLY need to do this juice feast for a longer period of time.. maybe after I finish my 14 days on Sunday AM, I could continue on to do most days juice feast and when I feel I HAVE to eat I can have a raw dinner or even maybe an Amy’s Organic like I was doing.

I need to not get into raw gourmet a bunch yet - I have bought 5 recipe books!.. I do want to make some of those Kale chips in the dehydrator when I come off my juice feast. I also found a recipe for marinated and dehydrated eggplant, it sounds very good.

I just need to be sure to not eat lots of nuts and seeds (fat) and get too into making bunches of gourmet raw until I lose allot more weight.

My sister and her family are coming over Friday night and spending the night before we head to St. Pete for the weekend. I Was trying to think of what I can make for everyone for Breakfast on Saturday before they we to mom’s and decided to do fruit smoothies. I can buy lots of frozen fruit and also make JB and Patricks and the boys with protein powder I guess.. I can use almond milk for them also.

I really want to get this weight off once and for all. I am tired of f*cking around with it.

Interesting enough I was VERY hungry at 1:30 pm and drank a decent size glass (maybe a cup and a third?) of almond milk and it’s an hour later and I am still not hungry.

I am a bit tired but it's just detox.

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My vitamix arrived!

I am having my first green smoothie (well that I made).. I used a half pound of spinach, 2 stalks celery, juice of one orange and flesh of one mango.. added half a dropper of stevia (almost too much sweetness though) and some superfoods greens powder, it’s pretty good, it seems to be really whipped and full of air.. I wonder if the greens powder did that?

Juice today:

3 apples
water
1 mango and ½ pineapple - 11am
Almond Milk (VERY hungry) 1:30pm
Wholefoods sparkling mineral water with whole blue berries 2:30pm)
Green Smoothie! (full of air?) spinach, celery, orange juice & mango w/ greens powder